Where In the World Have You Been? A Man Cold is Where!

It’s been a while. But I can explain. I got sick with this reoccurring crud that I get. It started, oh, about three weeks ago. I’ve shaken it now but it kept me laid up for a bit. I didn’t have the energy or will to write. I barely had the will to go on living. It was a man cold! And man colds are extremely painful and dangerous for us men folk.

It was touch and go around here for many days. I didn’t think I was going to pull through but my wife ensured me I was fine. I’ve discovered that when I’m on my death bed, which happens about four times a year, my wife likes to give tough love and strong words of encouragement to motivate me to go on living. For example, she likes to ignore my complaints or my cries for help. She’s like a mamma bird. I can’t imagine a mamma bird finding the task of dumping her nest so that her babies learn to fly, as something she looks forward to. But she does it because she loves them. I think that is why my wife ignores me when I’m sick. She loves me.

Another thing. Every one of our thermometers is worthless. I demanded my wife go and buy some new ones that actually work. I know my body and my body told me I was running a 112-degree fever. The thermometer, being broken and all, consistently showed I was running a temperature between 97 and 98 degrees. Don’t trust thermometers. They only work on babies. Throw them away and trust what your body and mind is telling you. If your body and mind is telling you are running fever, trust what it says and add two degrees on top for good measure.

Additionally, the sickness traveled south starting from my head, to my throat and lungs and finally down to my lower back. I was dumbfounded as to how my back came into this. But I’m certain it was from being sick, as our bodies tend to react accordingly. My wife said she was certain it was the result from me lying in the bed and on the couch for several days. I consider that a coincidence more than anything.

At any rate, you can judge for yourself that I pulled through. I am thankful for that.