Why Do I Pay for Cable?

That’s something I haven’t figured out. The TV is never on. Well, that’s not entirely true. My children watch cartoons in the afternoon if they are on good behavior, but we try to limit their exposure to too much TV. My wife likes to watch a few shows. She usually records them and watches them when she has time. She hates it when I’m in the room while she’s trying to watch them. I make fun and criticize them. I hate them.

Me, on the other hand, I can’t think of anything I watch aside from football on Sundays. That’s only during football season and the occasional pay per view boxing match throughout the year. Outside of those few things, I never turn it on. My wife took the kids and traveled back to where we’re from during the summer for a few weeks. I was alone and went about my day, to work, the boxing gym, the kitchen, the bathroom and to bed. I never turned the TV on once. I don’t think it ever crossed my mind until I looked up and noticed an expensive big screen hanging on my wall. It might as well be a picture.

For example, the History Channel produced a series called the “Story of Us” or something close to that. I asked my wife to record it and I believe we have the entire series saved. I watched about 20 minutes of the first episode last week. I hate that! Why can’t I sit still and just enjoy the television? (I’m going to watch that sucker even if it kills me!)

It’s not like I am some super-active person. I can definitely sit on my butt with the best of them. I have just lost the ability to sit in front of the television. I used to think that it was a good thing not to be addicted to the television. However, it’s annoying when I feel like mellowing out but can’t sit longer than 15 minutes to try and find something worth watching. I mean we only have 400 channels to choose from. So I literally scroll up and down the guide for about 15 minutes and then turn it off.

I wonder if the quick availability of the internet has made me impatient. If I want to find something, I go to the internet. If I want to read something I go to the internet (or actually read a book). If I want to watch an older boxing fight, I go to the internet. If I want to watch a movie, I go to the internet.

So maybe I’m not the problem. Maybe it’s the stupid cable television’s fault! It runs commercials and never shows what I want to watch, when I want to watch it.

It reminds me of the lost art of handwriting. Who does that — takes the trouble to actually write stuff down, I mean? Do you know what my handwriting looks like? It looks like this. It’s horrible. I can’t read it. You couldn’t read it. My spelling is horrible and my vocabulary is that of a 10 year old when I try to write something out by hand. I actually become dumber when you put a pen or pencil in my hand.

Is this a developing trend? Is cable TV on its way out? Have we killed it? My God, what have we done!

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