To Care or Not to Care?


That is a line in life we’ve all towed or straddled. Specifically here though I am referring to do we care what others think of us. After we process this question we are faced with a fine line. Always the lines! Most of us like to feel secure enough in ourselves to say no; we don’t care what others think of us. I find that hard to believe, however. To a point, we should care.

The person who says they don’t care what others think is the same person who can’t wait to tell you he doesn’t care what you think of him. I’m not sure if this should be called redundancy or contradiction. I mean if he doesn’t care, why bring it up?

I’m one of the more stubborn people you will meet. I’ve been wrong many times, but I’ve never been unsure about anything. So naturally, I haven’t always endeared myself to everyone I’ve came across. Still, very rarely do I find myself without a care for another’s feelings or view toward me. I’m quick to make a wrong right. I’ve acquired a taste for humble pie. Granted, there are those special people we meet that it’s best not to care what they think of you. Those are the few exceptions, however.

If we truly don’t care what people think of us, why do we have the desire to make a “good impression.” Why shake hands, bother with manners, or even engage in conversation? Why trouble yourself with any sort of legacy? Even if it is no more than raising good kids or having people care enough to say nice things about you at your funeral one day.

I think this is just another myth in life that takes time to topple. Personally, I don’t put a lot of trust in anyone who doesn’t care what others think of them. If someone truly feels that way, then they probably don’t think a lot about themselves. Imagine living in a community made up of people who didn’t care what others thought? I would find the first road leading out of the place.

No, I figure if you have a healthy consideration for what others think of you, then you’re probably an alright person. I bet you have friends among various circles. People confide in you, trust you, and care for you. You’re willing to take on burdens and give favor because you know you will need the same from others someday. Reciprocity is the word. Don’t let anyone try to confuse you in saying this is a selfish motive. That is nonsense. It’s called community. It’s called relationships. Tell them to look up their meanings. They precede any human motive.

The Gospels all teach to be the “salt of the earth” and to “let your light shine.” I always found that to be decent advice.

I’m not intending to be a dime-store sage, but this myth needs to be busted. It goes against the essence of humanity and is a glaring contradiction in what it means to be a person.


4 thoughts on “To Care or Not to Care?

  1. I can appreciate where you are coming from with this perspective. I feel that a lot of times (including myself) say “I don’t care what other thinks” when we mean the exact oppositive. Whenever I’ve said it I have been frustrated or angry that someone put me down. Quickly, that defense flies out of my mouth. I do though really care what people think. I’ve always been a people pleaser..which often leads to me getting run over by people who clearly don’t care. Sometimes I have found myself wishing I could be more like them…care less… speak my mind and still be able to sleep at night. Anyway, appreciate you bringing up the fact that people that DO care have positive qualities about them! 🙂

    • Oh, we’ve all done that. Including yours truly. But we don’t mean it. At least if we are honest about it.

      You should find balance. There’s a fine line. Always the lines! Remember? haha.

      Most women are decent, nurturing, and caring. They tend to be the ones taken advantage of. But it works out in the grander scheme. Think of the wonderful influence that nature has on a family?

  2. Of course people care about what others think. The problem is that they care too much about it. Everybody wants to make the right impression ending up not telling what they are really thinking.

    • Very good point. I didn’t consider that side of the discussion when I put this down. I would agree with that. Sometimes we often care too much. It makes us inauthentic almost like an act.

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